My Soul Then Sings Read online

  She had felt her insides swirl and knew that she wasn’t going to like it. And she hadn’t.

  Ryan had confessed to having a one-night stand with Tiffany Knightly before they were married. Almost sixteen years later, he had faced a paternity test and the real possibility that he had another child. Patricia had stood by him. Patti had even befriended the fifteen-year-old Karlie during her mother’s last year. Why? Because Patricia loved him. Loved Ryan Oakes from the moment she had rested her golden eyes on him. He was her world—her everything.

  Lucky for her, the feeling had been mutual. He loved her with the same intensity. Their passion had blinded them to everyone else—including Brian. Fortunately, that was water under the bridge. She and Ryan now had a healthy relationship with their son. Brian knew he could depend on them to be there for him.

  She went into her lab at the Nassau University Medical Center to look at several films. Clasping her hands behind her back, she studied the frame for several minutes. The human brain was magnificent. Its intricacy never ceased to solicit awe and wonder.

  She heard the lab door creak open and turned her head. Whoever it was knew better than to invade her turf when the door was closed. She knew it had to be important.

  Dr. Timothy Newhouse poked his head through the open space. In a deferential tone, he said, “Dr. Oakes, sorry to interrupt, but you have a phone call.”

  “Thanks, Tim, and for the millionth time, please call me Patricia, or Patti. Dr. Oakes sounds too formal.”

  He nodded his assent before closing the door, but she knew the other physician would not take her up on the offer. He hadn’t yet. Walking over to her desk, she picked up the phone.

  “Mom, I’ve been calling your cell like crazy,” Brian said.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m in the lab.” She sauntered over to the door where her lab coat hung. She dug into the pocket and located her cell phone and looked at the screen. Sure enough, there were seven missed calls. Concerned, Patti asked, “What’s going on?”

  “I wanted to let you know I’m going to take a semester off. I’m putting the papers in but wanted to let you and Dad know first.”

  Brian’s carefree words got her attention. Patricia didn’t sanction that idea. Not one bit. He needed to get his career going full speed ahead. However, her son was a free spirit with a mind of his own. She knew better than to push or he would rebel.

  “What did your father say?” she asked.

  He cleared his throat. “Uh—well—I didn’t tell him yet. I was sort of hoping you’d tell him, or at least be there with me when I tell him.”

  Figures. It all made sense now. She was the chosen buffer. Ryan was going to hit the roof when he heard this news. For some reason, Brian had a bad case of wanderlust. He never seemed to settle down but was always on to the next thing. He was like that when it came to women too. Thankfully, he’d only brought one or two home. Otherwise, she’d need to install a revolving door.

  Patricia sought to dig into his thought pattern. “Get ready for a fight tonight. Honestly, I’m not thrilled with your plan, either. What brought this on?” Maybe there was some method to his madness.

  “Karlie” was his one-word explanation.

  “Oh?” Patricia drummed her fingers on the desk.

  “Well, her debut song got slammed,” Brian said. “I mean, people are bashing her left and right. I think I can help her. Karlie must build a name for herself. You know, build a fan base—one not connected to Tiffany.”

  Patricia didn’t understand how Brian could be of assistance. He was not a music major, and neither was he studying management. “And how do you propose she does that?”

  “Well, I’ve convinced Karlie to get some edge by doing some stunts and posting it to YouTube. She’d be an instant sensation. When she sings, her songs would mean something. I’m telling you, Mom, Justin Bieber was a YouTube sensation and now look at him! Who knows, Karlie might even land a reality show. I don’t care for some of them, but they are hot right now, replacing actual TV shows.”

  Does he know how crazy he sounds? This had to be Brian’s most farfetched scheme yet. Wisely, Patricia held her tongue. How could she come across as conciliatory but convince Brian to abandon this foolish plot?

  Patricia swallowed. Gathering her thoughts, she said, “Brian, I think I see your thought pattern, but why you? Why do you have to be the one who drops out of a renowned university to do this?”

  “Why not me?” he countered.

  “Well, what about Jamaal? Is her boyfriend in on this?”

  “No, he’s not intrigued with our plan.”

  For the first time she detected what could be a kink in Brian’s plan. “I applaud Jamaal for demonstrating good sense,” she said. “I can’t even see Karlie going along with this. She always seemed so—”

  “Straitlaced? Goody Two-shoes?”

  In spite of herself, Patricia laughed. Brian’s wit was impossible to resist. She looked at her watch. She had surgery at two p.m. and needed to get back to her prep work.

  “I have to go, but we need to discuss this further,” Patricia said. “Are Neil and Myra on board with this?”

  “I don’t know yet,” Brian said. “Karlie is telling them tonight.”

  Patricia pictured Neil and Myra in her mind. They fostered a close-knit family. There was no way Neil would condone their children’s actions. Maybe after speaking with her father, Karlie might drop the idea and focus on her studies. Patricia hoped so.

  “I can only imagine Neil’s reaction,” she mumbled. She knew she would hear it soon enough.

  Chapter Six

  “Brian, I didn’t expect to see you here.” Ryan raised his eyebrows. “What’s going on?”

  He thought he was coming home to see his wife in all her glory. Instead, she was dressed in a pair of white linen slacks and a chic blue wool sweater. He went over and kissed her on the cheek.

  Brian did not wait for a hug. “Dad, I’m taking a semester off.”

  “Don’t you think you have done enough exploring to last a lifetime?” he said. Don’t you think you’ve wasted enough of my money on frivolity? he didn’t say.

  “It’s for a good cause,” Brian said.

  Ryan glared. “Earning a degree is for a good cause. You need to establish a career. Spababies could use you.”

  Ryan had wanted to spend more time at home and build his relationship with his son so he had sold businesses. But once Brian graduated from high school, Ryan wanted to return to work. Then he had met real estate tycoon, Michael Ward at a caucus, and the two decided to venture into business together.

  Spababies was born amidst two platters of steaks and potatoes. Michael had the connections, and they both had the resources. Spababies was a deluxe childcare service for mall shoppers. Parents no longer had to hassle with their children at the mall. They could drop them off at the center and shop to their hearts’ content. Michael had designed the center with state-of-the-art security systems, and Ryan was pleased they had a 100 percent positive rating. Hard to get, tough to maintain.

  Brian shook his head. “I’m not interested in working for you.”

  “What’s wrong with working with your father?” he asked.

  Patti put a hand on his arm. “Let’s just hear him out, honey.” She gestured to Brian to continue.

  “I don’t want to hear him out,” Ryan said. “Brian is impulsive, reckless, and has a bad case of itchy feet.”

  “Wow. You’re talking about me like I’m not standing here,” Brian mumbled.

  “Give him a chance,” Patti said. “There’s no need for things to get ugly.”

  Ryan clenched his jaw until he simmered down. Keep calm. Kind words. “So where are you planning to go this time?” he asked, shedding his jacket and slinging it across the couch.

  “We’re thinking of starting with L.A.”

  Ryan arched an eyebrow. “We?”

  “It’s not just Brian, honey. It’s Brian and Karlie,” Patricia interrupted.
/>   Ryan’s chest caved in after she delivered that bombshell. He staggered like a drunken man and dropped into the couch. This, he had not expected.

  “Karlie? Karlie? What do you mean, son?”

  “Yes—uh—Karlie’s song didn’t do so well, so we’re going to build her a fan base,” Brian said. “Our plan is to embark on atypical adventures for her, and then post them on YouTube.”

  “Have you lost your mind?” Ryan roared, jumping to his feet. “That is a cockamamie idea. Right now, you don’t sound like a college graduate. You sound like a buffoon—a nincompoop.”

  Patricia’s eyes were the size of saucers. “Ryan! How dare you speak to our son like that! Words have life. You will not be demeaning!”

  Ryan was about to respond when Brian laughed.

  “Dad, you’re hilarious. I didn’t expect such a spewing of outdated words. But, I’m an adult, and I can make a decision like this without your consent.”

  “Well, how do you plan to fund this scheme? Because I’m not paying for your shenanigans. It’s about time you become responsible,” Ryan challenged.

  Brian met him eye for eye. “We don’t need your money, Dad.” He shook his head. “Karlie’s got plenty of her own. Or have you forgotten? She’s been frugal, but as I’ve told her, she needs to live a little.”

  Live a little! Ryan was beside himself. He couldn’t believe this was happening. Was this all some sick joke? God, are you there?

  Ryan strove to gather his wits. He threw his son a curveball. “Brian, you’re not thinking this all the way through. Karlie is inexperienced and gullible. You don’t want her developing feelings for you, do you?”

  He shouldn’t have asked.

  “To be honest, I wouldn’t mind,” Brian confessed. His confession seemed torn from him as if it were something he had been walking around with for a while.

  I would, Ryan thought. I would mind a lot. In less than five minutes, Ryan had entered the Twilight Zone. Or, maybe this was a nightmare and he would soon awaken, hopefully.

  “Is that what this is about Brian?” Patricia asked. “You like her?”

  Brian wrinkled his brow. “I’m not sure, but I’m drawn to her somehow.”

  This cannot be happening. Ryan did an about-face and walked outside his home, leaving the front door ajar. He stood by his well-manicured lawn and sniffed the air with appreciation. The beautiful flowers were in bloom, and the scents greeted his nostrils, but they did nothing to ease his troubled mind.

  Now was the opportune time for him to confess the truth. But he held back. With gripped fists, he took several deep breaths. To tell would mean losing Patricia—and Brian.

  Ryan felt sweat beads form around the nape of his neck. Even his upper lip felt moist. In rapid strokes, he undid his tie and slung the noose from around his neck. Then he held his head in his hands. This cannot be happening.

  Ryan heard footsteps behind him and knew Patricia had come outside to check on him.

  She put her arms around his midriff and hugged him.

  He cradled her against him and prayed. Please, God, I’m going to lose everything.

  “What is it, honey?”

  Patricia’s gentle inquiry was almost his undoing. If only he could tell her. If only it were that simple.

  “I’m just afraid for him,” Ryan said. “And I can’t do anything.”

  Patricia smirked. “Short of sabotaging him every step of the way, your hands are pretty much tied on this one, love.” She patted him on his chest. “Brian has good sense and street smarts. He and Karlie will be okay.”

  Ryan wasn’t listening. His mind had grabbed onto one word. Sabotage. It was evil. It was childish . . . It was his saving grace. There was no need to confess if he could put a wrinkle—no, a tidal wave—into their plans. He would ask Brian to give him his itinerary. Ryan perked up and swung his wife in his arms. Bending her over, he gave her a kiss befitting a princess. “Thanks, Patti. You always know exactly what to say.”

  And thanks to her, he now knew what he had to do.

  Chapter Seven

  Karlie tried to reach Jamaal several times, but he didn’t answer. Finally, she left a voice mail. “Jamaal, please call me. I read your text, and we need to talk.” She swiped her phone to end the call. Next, she called Brian. “How did it go?” she asked.

  “It wasn’t as bad as I expected, although my dad blew a fuse,” he said.

  “My father wasn’t thrilled either. But, I’m in if you are.” Karlie quivered with a mixture of fear and anticipation.

  “Yes, I’m in,” he said. “I’m not backing out of this.”

  Karlie breathed a sigh of relief, but some straggling doubt reared its head. “Do you think we’re doing the right thing?”

  “Only one way to find out,” he chuckled.

  Karlie took exception at the glib reply. She wondered if Brian had thought things through. Their decisions today affected their tomorrow. She was plagued with nights of worry.

  “How can you be so nonchalant about this? This is our life we’re interrupting, all for a grand scheme that may not work.”

  “Correction, this is our life we’re living. And it will work. We must speak it into being. Positivity is half the battle.”

  His confidence was reassuring. Karlie blew out a huge gulp of air. She knew she was wavering, but a part of her was also curious to see how this would all play out. “I’m tripping out about this, but I’m also looking forward to it. You know what I mean?”

  “Sure do.”

  “I’ve been praying for God’s direction and for Him to lead us. I know God won’t steer us wrong.”

  “Well, make sure you bring Him along,” Brian said.

  In spite of herself, Karlie laughed at his somewhat irreverent tone. “You know you can only avoid God for so long, don’t you?” She’d been trying to get Brian into church ever since her conversion, but he avoided church as if it were the plague.

  True to form, he changed topics. “I’ve got to go,” he said. “I need to make some preparations and plan our excursions. My dad wants a detailed list of our where and when.”

  “Good idea,” Karlie said. “E-mail it to me when you’re done.” She shivered with glee. “Summer can’t come soon enough.”

  Karlie confronted Jamaal as soon as he exited Jerome S. Coles Sports Center. It was a fifteen-minute walk to his studio apartment in Carlyle Court or a three-minute ride on the 6 or R train. It didn’t matter to her. Either way, she wasn’t leaving his side until they had thrashed things out.

  “I called you all night. Why didn’t you answer the phone?” Karlie asked.

  He wore his basketball garb with a towel slung over his shoulder. Jamaal was funky and dripping wet. Sweat poured down his body, but Karlie couldn’t have cared less.

  Jamaal dropped his gym bag to the floor. He wiped his forehead, his face, and his neck—and everything else he could to keep from answering her question.

  She clenched her teeth to keep from screaming at him, already knowing he would answer her only when he was good and ready. “Are you going to explain that text you sent me last night?”

  “You can read,” Jamaal said. “You saw what it said.” He hefted his gym bag over his shoulder and walked away from her.

  Dressed in thigh-high three-inched heeled boots, Karlie had hoped he would’ve hopped on the train. Ignoring her protesting feet, she rushed after Jamaal and strove to keep up with his longer strides.

  After almost tripping on a crack in the sidewalk, Karlie grabbed his arm and applied pressure. They stood by the crosswalk of Eighth Street and Broadway. Jamaal stopped, but he refused to make eye contact. Mutinous, she maintained her stance. They were tackling this conversation, even if it took her all night.

  “I’m not letting you go, Jamaal Weathers,” she insisted. “I love you. You love me. We’re a team.”

  His nostrils flared. “Oh yeah? If we’re a team, how can you be okay with leaving me and going off with Brian on some escapade? What am I suppo
sed to do when you’re gone? I thought it was a fluke that would pass, but I see you’re serious about this”—he formed quotation marks with his hands—“adventure.” He peered down at her with an imperially arched eyebrow.

  In all the years she’d known Jamaal, he’d never been so condescending toward her. Karlie shook her head. “What’s with you? You’re not yourself.”

  “I’m fine,” Jamaal wheezed. “It’s just . . .”

  Karlie gestured with her hands. “Go on.”

  A passerby pushed past her, and Karlie hobbled to maintain her balance. Jamaal reached out a hand to steady her.

  “Okay, I’ll speak plain,” he said, pulling her out of the pedestrians’ paths. “It bothers me that I can’t even spend the night with you or vice versa, but you’ve got no problem sleeping with Brian in a tent or wherever it is you’ll be.”

  Karlie rocked backed on her heels. Her mouth popped open. Jamaal was jealous. Of Brian? “It’s not the same, and you know it. Brian and I aren’t dating, so there’s no need to worry about anything.” She shook her head. “The three of us have always been close. We’ve all hung out numerous times before, so I don’t get why this is any different.”

  He jutted his jaw. “It is different. Brian’s mostly your friend. I tolerate him most of the time, but I think he’s flaky.” He stooped to stare into her eyes. “Have you taken a good look at him? Don’t think that just because I’m a guy I don’t notice how the girls are crazy about Brian. And if I have to spell it out for you, then you’re even more gullible and naïve than I thought.”

  Stung, Karlie stepped back. Jamaal was being insulting, and she wasn’t having it. She liked that he was opinionated and had a mind of his own, but she was nobody’s doormat. Karlie stormed off, leaving him standing there.

  She strutted back to Mercer Street with the practiced precision of an experienced New Yorker.

  “I don’t know who he thinks he’s talking to, but he’s not talking to me like that. Imagine the nerve of him calling me gullible and naïve. There’s nobody more gullible than he is. He’s the one worried about his friends and what they think because he’s not having sex. He’s the one without a backbone to stand up for his principles,” she mumbled, walking hastily.