A Reason to Sing Page 10

  “No, you didn’t. Megan has a mind of her own, and she chose to marry him. Ryan deserves to be loved. Your actions probably ruined their wedding night.” She shook her head. “You need to call and apologize.”

  Brian’s jaw clenched. “I’m not calling him to give an apology I don’t mean.”

  “God loves the undeserving. He sends rain on the just and unjust because He is Love.” Her eyes pleaded with him. “You need to fix this.”

  “I don’t think I did the wrong thing. Ryan could have killed her husband.”

  “‘Could have’ isn’t proof, and I choose not to believe it.” She wiped her face. “Megan must not either. Why else would she marry him?”

  Brian’s hands flailed. “I don’t know. For money? For revenge?”

  “What about love?” Karlie shot back.

  He snorted. “Believe me, Megan is not in love with Ryan. Did you see when she was reciting her vows? She clearly wasn’t into it. She also wore black. Black is a clear indication she was grieving. I wouldn’t be surprised if Ryan strong-armed her into marrying him.”

  Karlie pursed her lips. “Ryan will always be guilty in your eyes. I see that now.”

  He nodded. “That’s because he is. Ryan will do anything to get his way. And I can’t believe you’re here defending him when you know how he treated me. If your mother hadn’t shown me love, I would be dead or in jail.”

  She wiped the corners of her eyes. “That’s why I want you to see there’s still hope for Ryan. When your parents gave up on you, my mother didn’t. I didn’t. God didn’t.” Karlie pinned him with a gaze. “I love you, Brian, but Ryan’s blood is in my veins. I love him and I’ve forgiven him. You weren’t the only one he wronged.” She broke into fresh tears. “He denied me. He made me feel unworthy. My father once rejected me.” Her shoulders shook under the weight of her pain.

  Brian attempted to take her in his arms.

  Karlie pushed him away. Her face was puffy and her cheeks red. “I don’t want you to touch me. I’m hurting something fierce, and I need to time alone to process.” She walked toward the door.

  “No.” Brian rushed over. “You can’t leave me. You’re the love of my life. This thing between us is stronger than any anger you might feel toward me. We can get through anything together. My issue with Ryan has nothing to do with us.”

  “It has everything to do with us. Why can’t you see that?” Karlie touched his face with a sad smile. “Our love is real, and I know I’ll love you for a lifetime.” She stepped back. “But I can decide to love you from afar. I can’t sleep next to a man who wallows in anger and makes bitterness his bed.”

  Ch. 18

  Tonight was the night. Merle eyed the clock. It was almost six-thirty. Karlie should arrive any minute. She listened as the praise team and musicians warmed up their voices and instruments. The praise leader sang Shout to the Lord, and Merle bobbed her head to the beat. She sat in the second row. The first row was reserved for the First Lady and the other ministers.

  Karlie walked inside.

  As soon as she entered the sanctuary, the music stopped. The team rushed over to her to get autographs and take pictures. Karlie posed and smiled for the cameras. Merle could see how poised Karlie remained under the spotlight. She really was her mother’s daughter.

  For a moment, Merle felt a huge sadness that Tiffany wasn’t there to see Karlie shine. Then she smiled. Tiffany had died in Christ, so they would see each other again. The thought was comforting.

  Another thought occurred.

  Would she?

  Merle shook off that thought. Of course, she would see her daughter. She stood to wave at Sister Inez. Merle bit back a smirk when she saw Sister Inez take in her outfit. Merle wore a black lace top with a floral wraparound skirt, which flowed down to her ankles. The form-fitting ensemble showed off her toned physique of which Merle was very proud.

  Sister Inez lifted her chin.

  Merle rolled her eyes. Sister Inez could keep her oversized hats and grandma gowns. Merle intended to be on the best-dressed list when she got to glory.

  Merle used her gold-flecked nails to touch her new sew-in, courtesy of Karlie’s hairstylist. Shanna had done magic to her hair as she had also gotten Karlie camera-ready when she and Brian were posting their YouTube adventures. Merle shook her head. Karlie and Brian had given her a fright, especially when they had been in the water with alligators. When their escapades ended, Karlie had kept Shanna on.

  If she hadn’t seen it sewn in, Merle would have thought the twelve-inch curls were hers. Merle’s hair had never been the same since the fire. Instinctively, she touched her face. She had fine marks that told her been-through but Merle knew she was beautiful and she had Karlie to thank for her million-dollar face.

  Karlie made her way over, and Merle greeted her with a kiss.

  “Grandma, you look hot,” Karlie said.

  Merle struck a pose. “Diahann Carroll and Iman have nothing on me.”

  Karlie laughed and surveyed her outfit. “I’ve never seen you in a wrap-skirt before. I like it.”

  “I do, too. I wanted to try something new.”

  “Well, it looks fab.”

  Merle didn’t add that she wanted to make Sister Inez jealous. Everybody knew she had blown up after the death of her beloved, Roy James. Why she had to call the man by two names Merle never understood. Besides God, Roy James was Sister Inez’s favorite topic of conversation.

  Merle secured the bow again on her skirt. It kept loosening around her small waist. Her vigorous workouts were paying off. She would need a new wardrobe.

  “Karlie, we’re ready for you,” one of the members of the praise team said.

  “I’m coming!” Karlie shouted. She kissed Merle on the cheek. “Save me a seat.”

  “I will.”

  Sister Inez made her way over to sit in the front pew.

  Merle kept her smile and greeted Sister Inez with a Judas-kiss. The jealousy of position rankled. Merle wanted to be seen as the church mother and spiritual advisor –albeit a hot one. Ever since her tongues-fail, Sister Inez kept giving her the side eye, as if she thought Merle had faked it. She didn’t say anything, but Merle felt as if she was under a microscope and a spotlight whenever she stood to give God praise.

  Well, all that was about to change tonight. Her granddaughter was performing, and nothing was going to keep her praise down. Her voice was going to be on top.

  “I wish Roy James were here to see this,” Sister Inez turned around to say.

  Merle patted her on the arm. “I imagine he’s in heaven kicking up a leg or two. He is getting his praise on better than us down here.”

  Sister Inez’s eyes twinkled. “I agree. He is probably two-stepping and trying to do the mashed potato.” Her shoulders shook. “That man swore he could dance.”

  Merle laughed with her. She felt a pang that she had no stories to share about Clifford. Well, nothing good anyway. Clifford Peterson had been a rapist, and Merle had stayed with him. No way she was telling that. She rebuked the past and tapped her feet to the music.

  “That granddaughter of yours grew up so beautiful,” Sister Inez said. “Is she seeing anybody? My grandson would make a good partner.”

  Merle froze. It took effort for her eyes not to widen or her mouth to pop open. Sister Inez had nerve. She bit her tongue to keep from screaming, “Are you out of your ever-loving mind to think Karlie could be with that hunchback?” Then she realized that she only needed to tell the truth. Sort of.

  “Karlie’s engaged to Brian Oakes,” she said. “She’s known him for years.”

  Merle knew about Karlie and Brian’s fallout, but Karlie hadn’t returned the ring or cancelled any of the venues. Merle didn’t think they could be over just like that. They had too much history. Besides, Karlie pined over him. Merle had been subjected to hours of conversation about Brian. She had taken Karlie’s side because she didn’t want Karlie with Brian, but she sure as heck wouldn’t see her with Dr. Glen Richa
rds either. She would gouge her eyes out first.

  Merle tilted her head. “How’s Glen doing?” Glen was reserved and polite. He had such a humble nature that Merle wouldn’t have known he was a doctor. However, Sister Inez made sure they knew it. They knew all about his accomplishments. Merle sniffed. Every week, Sister Inez mentioned his name in their prayer circle as if her grandson was the only one who needed God, protection, and now a wife.

  Sister Inez’s chest puffed. “He’s going on a missionary trip to Africa. I’m so glad he’s using his skills as a physician for the Lord.”

  That meant he was broke. He would be looking for Karlie to fund his expenses. Merle pursed her lips. No way was she having that. She wasn’t about to let anyone take advantage of Karlie’s generosity.

  Except herself, of course.

  “Amen, my sister,” Merle said. “It’s good he’s allowing God to use him. I believe when God calls you, He finds a way to support what He wants you to do.” Because it sure wouldn’t be Karlie. She closed her eyes, and a picture of the potential grandchildren Karlie and Brian might have flashed before her eyes. She held her chest. Oh, goodness. No. No. No.

  Merle’s eyes sprang open. That image seared her brain. In a daze, she realized Sister Inez was still talking.

  “Yes, He does look out for Glen. God is good, He sure enough is. He makes ways where there are none. Roy James worked hard to make sure Glen would be debt-free, and through the grace of God, he’s remained that way. After Loretta overdosed, we didn’t think we could raise a young child at our age, but God saw us through and look at him now.” She mopped her brow. “I’m so proud of him. Too bad Karlie’s taken. With her skin and that hair, they would make some Shemar Moore lookalikes.”

  Umm, Shemar-No. Sister Inez needed new bifocals. Glen’s genes would create little Shreks with good hair from her side. Come to think of it, Merle was surprised Sister Inez knew who Shemar Moore was, as that woman stayed prayed up all the time. Her ashy knees were a testament to that. Merle looked at a blinking Sister Inez.

  Oh, she wanted a response. “Glory to God,” Merle said. When in doubt of what to say next, give God praise. That never failed.

  Sister Inez nodded.

  Karlie entered the stage and began warming up her voice.

  It was Merle’s turn to brag. “I’m so proud of my baby. She could’ve gone down the wrong path after her mother’s death, but look at her. She’s in college.” On a hiatus… “She’s engaged.” Technically. Brian had put a ring on it. It was still there. “And, she loves singing for God.” Always sandwich the lies with a truth was Merle’s motto. It made the lies taste better.

  Sister Inez nodded. “That’s why I thought she would’ve been a good match for my Glen.” She dabbed at her eyes.

  “Her fiancé is also saved. Did you see him with her on YouTube?”

  Sister Inez shook her head. “I don’t know how to use the computer. Glen keeps telling me to get on so he can face talk with me. The telephone still works.”

  Merle raised an eyebrow. “You mean Face Time?” When Sister Inez nodded, she said, “I was scared of the computer at first, but I didn’t stop until I figured it out.” Merle had been motivated to connect with Karlie. She would be forever grateful for the invention of social media. “I think Brian’s being considered for a deacon.” That lie fell easy from her lips. “He’s in law school,” she added. Another truth sandwich.

  Sister Inez barely gave a nod because Pastor Blake had called the service to order. The praise team stepped forward and began to sing as Karlie came and stood next to Merle.

  Merle lost herself in worship. She lifted her hands and felt God’s presence surround her. She jumped when she heard her name called. She had been asked to pray. Merle went forward and eyed the crowd. There were close to one thousand people in attendance. She was ready for this moment. She held up her hands and offered God praises.

  And Merle realized she had plenty to be thankful for.

  Merle closed her eyes and prayed, allowing the words to flow. She didn’t know how long she praised and glorified God, but she poured her heart out. When she was done, the crowd was on its feet rejoicing and shouting. Merle opened her eyes and looked around. What happened?

  Even Sister Inez was dancing and shouting.

  Merle’s head swelled. She felt giddy. God must have just used her. Merle walked back toward her row with her chest puffed. Then pride took over. She closed her eyes and jumped “in the spirit” to the first row. Merle wanted the crowd to see God had put her there. She deserved to be in the front seat.

  Karlie started to sing, which led Merle into an even greater frenzy. The louder the praise, the longer Merle danced.

  “Grandma!” Merle heard Karlie’s panicked voice in the microphone. She kept jumping and pretended not to hear her. She couldn’t be caught up and still hear Karlie. She started praising God even more. Karlie must have called Merle’s name because she had been surprised at how God was using her.

  When Merle felt herself being dragged to sit down by Sister Inez, who was obviously trying to interfere with God’s plan, Merle wasn’t having that. Oh, no. She kept on praising and jumped even higher.

  This time, two sets of hands took Merle by the shoulders and forced her to sit. She lowered her head to hide her red face. Inez had pushed her to sit down like her praise was fake.

  She felt a cloth tossed onto her legs. Merle opened her eyes and looked around. Quite a few eyes were on her. A few people even hid their laughter behind their hands. What was so funny?

  Merle strove to catch her breath. Praising was a better workout than the elliptical, better than—

  Hmm? Why does my bottom feel bare?

  Why am I feeling skin?

  Karlie sat beside her with concerned eyes. “Your skirt fell off,” she whispered. “It loosened while you were praising. I called out to you, but you were under the anointing.”

  Merle blinked her eyes slowly.

  Sister Inez picked up her skirt off the floor and brought it to her. She held the garment as if it was an offense and dropped it in Merle’s lap. “You weren’t wearing a slip,” she said.

  Merle kept her head low. How was she going to face everyone after she had bared her butt? She wrapped the cloth around her and allowed the women to lead her out of the church. Karlie followed.

  Merle felt tears fall as she sobbed into her hands. She was so humiliated. Why had God exposed her in that manner?

  She had no one to blame but herself.

  “Take me home,” she said to Karlie. She would worry about getting her car later. Maybe one of the deacons would drive it home. Merle didn’t care. “Get me out of here,” she begged.

  Karlie huddled her close and they left. They drove home in silence. Karlie parked her car and for a moment was silent.

  Merle heard the distinct sound of laughter. She turned to face Karlie. Karlie’s shoulders shook. Her laughter bubbled out.

  “Why are you laughing? I’ll never be able to show my face there again.” Merle wiped her face with a cloth and jabbed Karlie on the arm. “I can’t believe you’re cracking up at my expense.”

  When she entered the house, Merle vowed she was going to go through her wardrobe and toss every wrap-skirt she owned into the garbage. She gritted her teeth as Karlie kept laughing. Karlie laughed until tears slid down her cheekbones.

  When Karlie sobered, she faced Merle. “I’m sorry, Grandma. I didn’t mean to laugh, but all I could think was thank God for granny panties. Because if you were wearing a thong…” Karlie held her stomach and dissolved into another fit of giggles.

  Merle covered her mouth with her hand. It was kind of funny now that she wasn’t under the spotlight. Her sense of humor surfaced, and Merle chuckled. She pressed the button to lower the window and released a heartfelt yell:

  “Thank you, God, for granny panties!”

  Ch. 19

  She shared his bed. Every night. Ryan insisted on it. He didn’t touch her and slept with his back tur
ned, but he was there. Megan stared up at the ceiling with tears in her eyes. How was this her life? She couldn’t go another three hundred plus days with this man.

  She had nixed the lingerie idea on their wedding night. Instead, Megan had gone to sleep dressed in her wedding gown with Cooper tucked in her arms. She hadn’t trusted Ryan to help her but had called Karlie to assist her out of her dress the next morning. Fortunately, Karlie hadn’t asked any questions. The younger woman had hugged her and left as quickly as she had come to Megan’s rescue.

  The first few days of their marriage, Megan had protested the whole sharing of the bed thing by changing rooms, but Ryan had a key to every door in the house. She had awakened the next morning to find him in the bed. She then slept on the couch. How that man fit his six-foot-one frame on the couch was beyond her. He lay there, close to falling and gripping the edge, fast asleep. Their silent war continued. Megan next tried the master tub. She knew she would be sore, but she wanted nothing to do with Ryan, but Ryan had slept in a sitting position in the tub. Megan had never met a more determined man. Megan would have left and gone to a shelter if she didn’t have Cooper.

  “I don’t want you in my bed!” she had raged, shaking her fists.

  He folded his arms. “I won’t sleep alone.”

  “I don’t want you here.”

  “I won’t sleep alone.”

  Megan had brought Cooper into the mix. His little body contorted between them. Ryan would awaken with a little foot in his face. Megan’s back was sore from Cooper’s butt pressed against her. Still, she hadn’t chased Ryan from her bed. In the end, Megan had relented. Cooper slept in his own bed. Her son was an acrobat in his sleep and she needed her rest.

  It irritated her how well she slept next to the dragon. Every night she waged war with her eyelids, but lost every time. Megan had awakened twice to Ryan’s arms around her midriff. Now she slept with her back straight, less than an inch from falling off the bed.

  Their breakfasts were tense affairs. Ryan would attempt to engage her in small talk, and she would provide one-word answers. Her stomach relaxed only when he walked out the door and she heard the Lincoln’s door slam. Megan would then hum a tune and get Cooper ready for the day. She had four hours to herself until Ryan stopped in for lunch.